Wednesday, February 18, 2004 @2/18/2004 12:15:00 AM
Class:
Nothing much today.. as usual.. tutorial tutorial lecture lecture... today physics tutor, mr ho, kinda lost his cool.. scolded a few of my classmates.. kinda like a direct-attack.. but i mean i understand la.. i myself seldom bring physics tys to school.. feel damn bad also.. cos usually he doesn't scold.. just carry on with lessons.. think that some of us take him for granted.. ashley got quite pissed over it even though he didn't scold her.. she was like banging the book on the table.. n said "some ppl just haf to pick on someone to make them feel good".. thought that was rather scary.. and a lil bad.. budden i think back.. if that tutor was praeman i probably would do the same thing.. so i just shuddup.. lol.. got 11.5/20 for maths test.. super easy test.. nv study hard enough.. rather disappointed... so far.. haven't given in my best for all the test yet.. that's damn saddening la.. haven't been putting in much effort in my work.. dunno what's wrong with me.. procrastinating(following mr yit's footstep).. chinese lessons was rather nonsense.. supposed to do this chinese book review presentation thing.. since i haven't been like reading any chinese book (the one i read was all love qoute.. how to review?).. so i decided to talk bout the super nice tv serial i watch.. feng shen bang (guard of honour ithink).. present present with broken chinese.. i even showed the class how the 3 'heros' kill all the nonsense.. action action.. then e tutor suspect that i watch the tv serial one.. at first i say i read the book n watch show.. budden later she ask again.. decide to own up.. but she also nv say anything la.. lol...
Bowling:
Rather disappointed with my juniors.. out of 10.. only around 2 are enthu about bowling.. n out of the 8 unenthu ones.. 7 are either guest students or appeal students.. are they like taking things for granted.. Mr Lian gone thru lotsa trouble to get all of them into SA.. but they aren't keen bout bowling at all.. all they wanted was to go to a decent college for 1st 3 mths i guess.. i can understand why they are not enthu bout bowling now.. cos not as if i am.. most of us haf been bowling since sec1.. rather sick of it at times.. but to me.. by appealling in thru bowling means u must commit urself fully to bowling.. this is not morally right.. how can u take everything that had happened for granted.. one of e j2 bowlers, appealled student, wanted to quit bowling n join badminton.. asking her what's her reason, she said: since i cannot contribute much to bowling, think i should join badminton n i may be able to contribute.. what is this man... in the first place she didn't really commit herself into bowling.. skip trainings here n there for no valid reason.. very disappointed with her attitude.. taking things for granted... this really sux.. have been quite disturbed by this issue for a long time.. take the recent charity bowl for example.. we haven't even bowled.. she alr say "pls lor.. we r bowling against team singapore.. forget it.." how can she say that.. i mean.. u'll nv know.. by saying that.. most of my morale is already gone.. where is the spirit? issit the team captains' fault for all these.. i think we are partially at fault.. i feel useless.. how can i solve this problem.. one thing i'm gonna suggest to mr lian is to take less appealled students (unless they are those with real potential or "morally-upright").. n take in more new students.. who are truely interested in bowling.. i know by doing this we may be sacrificing all the possible medals we could've gotten.. but what's the point of getting a bunch of experienced bowlers who has lost their passion for bowling n are taking things for granted... not saying that all my juniors are liddat.. but there are a few who are truely committed.. glad to haf them.. n i dare say that the 2 tk bowlers are the one who are committed.. very proud of them =).. glad to haf all my j2 girl bowlers who are truely committed too.. j2 guys too.. the j2s are very much bonded.... i'm not being biased here.. but this is the fact.. btw the j2 girl that i complained about just now.. as a teammate.. i am rather unhappy with her.. but she's a nice fren~ =) Hmm He told me.. "Don't expect the rest to do what u expect urself to do" cos in this case.. i'm the vice-captain.. i do get leadership points but the rest doesn't... so in this case.. i haf nothing to say.. lol.. terrible..
Friends:
Met up with wenting for a cup of coffee at starsbucks eastpoint.. on my way back... i start to utter some nonsense that i never ever told her before.. was telling her i'm being more n more like a loner in school.. it was when i find that ppl around me are very fake n after the breakup with sam that i start to drift myself away from the class n kinda leave myself out.. used to think that being alone is such an uncool thing.. but now.. i think i feel much better.. truer friendship starts to build up.. esp. with the bowlers.. and i will say manfred sam.. i slowly realised that i cherish these friends around me more n more.. i wanna thank my class girls too.. nv leave me out.. as concern as ever.. zhiminh still nags at me.. yuxin still talk cock with me.. palmy ashley lengsim too.... of cos this is nothing new.. but i feel that i begin to cherish all my friends more n more.. bowlers stand by me during my low days.. melissa anli xy vic teeshsien.. encouragement here n there.. manfred.. someone i feel very comfortable to talk to.. very trustworthy.. i may be just a normal fren who make no diff to their lifes. but ya.. to everyone.. thank u for everything man.. that includes u, lorraine! =) ok.. so i went on talking liddat.. n wenting thought i sounded like i have "aged" (she refuses to use the word "matured").. she say the way i said it sounds like i'm analysing myself.. finding out reasons for things i do n stuff.. true indeed.. wenting is one friend i know since pri1.. as yrs go by.. friendship just got stronger...
You:
Sorry if i bother u so much.. but i really wanna do everything so that i haf no regrets.. i can't really talk to u much on wkdays.. so forgive me if i miss u too much n start sms-ing u.. n i just did... 2nd time already.. shan't hide my feelings no more.. bet u're asleep.. do take care..
Long entry. X-country tml.. Good niTe..
♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach