Saturday, May 22, 2004 @5/22/2004 10:09:00 PM
The season is finally over.. overall girls' ranking : 5th......
issit complacency or something? never saw TJ as our opponent... we thought they are not bad.. but we were rather sure that we can do better than them.... buT.............. we are wrong.. they got the 4th placing we thought we will get.. big joke.. even my junior, mel, ask me.. how can we lose to bowlers like them.. ya.. indeed.. i wonder too.. whatever it is..
it's all too late.. on the last day.. when everything is over.. i looked at anli.. think i gave her a rather disappointed look.. then she was like "awww" then wanna hug me.. so i decided to whine (or u can that "teh") a bit.. but didn't know.. instead of whining.. i started crying out..... Loud i would say.. usually i just geng3 ye4.. but this time.. i finally can say i cried out man.. for the past few days.. wanted to cry.. when i see my fellow teammates wanting to give up.. some hugged me n cried.. so how can i cried with them.. i hafta be strong n tell them to fight on til the end.. many times.. singles.. doubles.. then quartet.. everyday i hoped for a better day.. but... yup.. things didn't go as i wished.. oh well.. this under-performance by EVERy bowlers really cost us a title.. wow..
i told myself b4 the tournament.. i cannot just let my fellow girl bowlers go up to the balcony n just bow for nothing again..i'm gonna get the title back this year.. seems like.... haizzzzz..
i'm not able to do that.. but.. nevertheless.. i dare say that i'm very very proud of the team.. if there's a prize for team spirit or bonding.. i'm sure SA will win it.. too bad the comp is not bout team spirit but bowling.. heh.. 12 out of 12 experienced bowlers n we can't grab anything.. big joke.. but i must admit that we are just avg bowlers.. no particular super good one... rj has 4 combined sch bowlers n the rest almost amateur i guess.. they win the championship.. so basically a school just need 4 pros to win.. i hate to say this but on the quartet day.. acjc girls really showed me what they are capable of.. they are good.. very good.. one of the games they bowled an 800 series.. WOW.. amazing man.. they even win Rj.. sa bowlers basically don't like ac bowlers... but that after bowling with them they are actually really nice peeps.. oh man.. not even 4th...... what have i done..... what have we done..... this whole championship is like a dream... clara n i said we are in dreamland.. 5th....... how....... think back.. how the hell did we get 5th..... i was so confident that we will get at least 4th.. over-confidence? maybe. but i will say overall the girls squad didn't do well... top ten 160.. what's that man.. issit the lanes are hard to deal with or something.. oh ya.. n ACjc councillors really sucks.. sent them down might as well don't send.. they only start cheering on the last day when SA sent 2 classes down to support.. SA was so loud that ac started to really cheer.. damn lousy la ac council.. SA 2 classes can beat them flat down alr.. kns.. lol.. n there're these 3 bimbotic ac councillors who cheer some bimbotic cheer.. like when one of the ac guys striked.. they will like shout.. "so-n-so, we love u!!!".. WAH PIANGZ! buay tahan.. maybe that's why ac guys are so ego.. lol.. saw mr khoo at the chinese drama thingy yesterday.. he told me he went to support on wed.. couldn't find me.. wah liew... probably if he appeared i might bowl better.. cos a lil bit more motivated.. lol.. but really appreciate that he took the time to come down.. must really thank those supporters.. if not for them.. the guys may not win the quartet title.. being truthful.. like lorraine said.. our guys haf very weak mental.. they need supporters.. could see that we the supporters came down.. they're all fired up.. too bad the supporters they sent in are from 2 of the guys' classes.. so actually none came to support the girls.. =(.. i'm probably too heck care bout the whole championship alr.. i was cool thru'out the whole thing.. b4 the championship.. i kept telling my teammates to chill.. cos some of them are like abit freaked out by the situation.. n all i tell them was "just go there n bowl.." n
i went there with a nothing-to-lose mindset rather than a i-wanna-win mindset.. that's probably why i failed.. some told me "not bad alr la.. last yr 7th leh.. this year 5th not bad alr.. next year surely 3rd...".... hahaha.. 4th is really within our reach.. so easy..... how can we lose to tj.. think we lack their will.. as in.. i can see some determination is tj bowlers.. haizzzzzzzzzzzz......... too late... to conclude: for me, i was too complacent.. not hungry for anything.. but as for the team.. i'm glad to haf such a cool n bonded team.. thank God for that.. teehsien n i agreed that we deserved to win the most.. but win or not is another thing.. to be serious.. i told teehsien.. if i wasn't the captain.. i won't be sad for the defeat.. but
as a captain.. i feel totally shattered.. i let my team down.. glad to haf this chance of being e girls' captain.. indeed an enriching one.. but before i finally know what's going on.. i led my team to a defeat.. an unexpected one i will say... captain: when he/she leads a team to victory.. he/she claimed the most credit.. however.. when he/she leads a team to defeat.. he/she is to be blamed the most.. i'm willing to shoulder the blame.. cos i know i haven't be doing a good job.. uncle henry told me i am a good captain but my bowling skills are not that yet.. wondered if he said that to make me feel better or what.. this particular championship is indeed a significant event of my life.. never have i felt so disappointed cos of bowling.. maybe because i'm the captain.. for the past years.. i just hafta bowl.. if i bowl well.. great.. if i don't.. who cares.. but this year.. it's different.. i want sa to win... whether i contribute to it i don't really care.. just as long as sa wins.. know my thinking is wrong.. i did try to bowl better so i can push my indiv position up.. but apparently i failed... hahahahha.. haizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.. hey i'm supposed to conclude.. waddda.. k la.. i've learnt quite alot thru'out this championship.. that's important though.. as in.. sometimes.. more important than those medal.. ok.. am i trying to console myself.. but yup.. what's done is done.. i'll just hafta move one.. this coming national age-group.. dunno whether to bowl not.. listened to this song time n time again.. hoping it will psyched(how to spell huh) me up...
They said you wouldn't make it so far ah ahhhh
and ever since they said it, it has been hard
but never mind the nights you had to cry
cause you would never let it go inside
you work real hard and you know exactly what you want
and need so believe and you can never give up
you can reach your goals
just talk to your soul and say
Chorus:
I believe i can
I believe i will[i will]
I believe i know my dreams are real[are real]
I believe i'll chant
I believe i'll dance
I believe i'll grow real soon[thats why]
and that is what i do believe
Your goals are just a thing in your soul ah ahhhh
and your know that your moves will let them show
you keep creating pictures in your mind
so just believe that they will come true in time
it will be fine leave all your cares and stress behind
just let it go let the music flow inside
forget all your pain and just start to believe
Chorus:
I believe i can[i believe i can oh yea}
I believe i will
I believe i know my dreams are real[all my dreams are real]
I believe i'll chant
I believe i'll dance
I believe i'll grow real soon
and that is what i do believe
Never mind what people say
hold your head high and turn away
with all our hopes and dreams
i will believe even though it's not for me
i won't give up i'll keep it up
look into the sky
i will achieve all my needs
i will always believe
whoa oa oa YEA
I believe i can
I believe i will[i can]
I believe i know my dreams are real[i got strength]
I believe i'll chant
I believe i'll dance[i gotta dance]
I believe i'll grow real soon
and that is what i do believe
-Yolanda Adams, "I believe"-