Sunday, September 17, 2006 @9/17/2006 12:24:00 AM
It's been LONGGGGG since I last blogged. Work is stacking up like nobody's business. Econs is drivin' me crazy. How come there're so many equations with soo many unknowns in them. Simi alpha beta gamma, Y, K, N, A, blah blah blah. Finding all kinds of reasons to explain what's going on in the economy. With all those assumptions, 9 out of 10 theories don't work in real life. There are Soo Many assignments to be handed in this sem. Micro econs.. they grade a few of ur tut and is counted in ur final result. They think what. with such implementation we will do our work is it. Yes we will, but when we don't know, we copy. cost it's COUNTed. The last time i was standing in front of my tutor mailbox, wanted to hand in my tutorial. But i forgot my tutor's name. So i called up one of my tutorial mates to ask for her name. She was like "Huh?! you finished alr meh?!" I was like "No.. I gave up alr. (Ok. that's after I tried)" She was like "Come copy ah! at least get some marks ma" Unable to succumb to temptation, I went to the deck to look for her.. Saw a few tables of econs student copying. Digusting leh. I copied 2 questions I left. Got back. My tut mate got like 86/100. I got 42. Even though I was like WTF, I didn't feel that bad. At least after my tutor went thru I'm enlightened. My tut mate was like comforting me, thinking that I was sad n stuff.. but in fact, I didn't feel that bad at all. Money and banking presentation. kena shoot by tutor for going out of pt. But I didn't feel too bad too! cos I am enlightened though i only got a B-. Ok. I just feel like complaining and KBing about econs.
I feel quite alone at times but that's something I've tried and alr gotten used to ever since sec sch. I must be "independent and secure" (-cindy). It's quite ironic how i used to tell people to pon OTOT and now i'm asking them to do so. It's funny how i enjoyed being a junior (< pressure and sheltered) and now I'm not. It's ironic how i want the juniors to take their time to improve but time doesn't allow that. It's saddening when i see juniors' terrified and angry faces when they looked at me. It's not unusual for a last min change in training plan (manda and i had planned for quite long) due to external factors. It's irresponsible of me to still let cindy do some of the saikang (e.g. scold ppl) even after she has stepped down. For now the saddest part is during training I wanna joke or play abit but I have to hold back. Nonetheless, it's heartwarming to see ppl constantly giving me valuable feedback (thru means of suaning me) for me to improve. It's motivating when ppl tell us that we've improved. It's nice that yuenching still ask me for otot and cindy still run with me (even though she alr ran). It's satisfying to see the team feeling the kick after training. It's touching when some girls standing up for me ("they got bully u not?").
KEVIN CHUA TIAN HAO, I LOVE YOU! :)
♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach